Where do I even begin this post? The only logical place is to start is at the beginning but I actually took a little trip to past Kir-land. I looked back over my wrap up posts from the last few years to try and find the words for 2021. The only thing I managed to drudge up from that experience is the importance of writing these posts if only just to see my own growth… so let’s dive in to the last 12 months.

I write these posts so I can still feel an intimacy with my past self & I think future Kir will look back on this year as a blur. “We were still living in a pandemic right? I shot how many weddings? Oh yea.. I remember the year we got Pepper!” Now, I’m trying to ask more probing questions when building my life: What were my goals? What did I prioritize? Where did I invest my love? The overwhelming answer to all 3 of these questions I this year was ‘work’. The past 5 years I’ve invested so much of my soul into being a successful entrepreneur but very little time actually defining success and happiness. I know this is starting to sound like a lip service Instagram post about “taking a step back to Live Laugh Love” and the truth is.. I’m not sure I’m going to take a big enough step back upcoming until I fix my priorities and my overall mentality through therapy and reflection. 
This year I thought a lot about people pleasing, privilege, money trauma, internalized capitalism and the idea of success. I thought more about income in context with the quality of life I want to live. Typically, when people ask about my financial goals my answer was always a very coy ‘the limit does not exist’ which is very much born from a scarcity mindset in childhood and an incredibly unhealthy relationship to finances instilled by my parents. This financial drive partnered with owning a business can be a beautiful endeavor but also super toxic. And, for the first time ever since picking up a camera, I felt trapped by my job in 2021.

Largely, this feeling has dissipated since fall (thank God I’m really stoked to return to it after my 3 month sabbatical) but because I committed to retaining all of my 2020 reschedules & booking a “full season” of new clientele to make up for COVID losses, I only had two 3-day stretches of consecutive days off from March until November as I shot 60 (41 large affairs & 19 intimate) weddings, 102 sessions (boudoir, family, lifestyle & engagement), 2 styled shoots at a conference I spoke at and also managed 7 associate weddings.  I’m honestly tired just reading that.

Now, Ben, always the practical one, argued “Well, you make your own schedule don’t you? I just don’t understand how this happened.” I’ll tell you… just like everyone else, this was also my first experience in a global pandemic and, in short, I overcommitted and got backed into a wall because of guilt, greed and ambition. The amount of joy I felt about finally getting to capture weddings again was often outweighed by missing personal experiences like travel, Thanksgiving & visiting with friends. That said, when I was actually AT a wedding, it was bliss. My clients were thankful and I still felt joy with a camera in hand. While I became overwhelmed with the demands of planning, vendor needs and business management… at the end of the day, it’s still my dream job. 

SO WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN AND WHO IS STILL READING THIS. 

Essentially, I think for the first time in my life I’m considering what is healthy for me and what leads to actual happiness. I’m currently in the process of ignoring societal norms, external pressures and the word “should” and officially entering therapy at the start of the new year to become an emotionally well-rounded human who is still excited to tell love stories through imagery. Endless thank you to the 67 couples we served below. I wouldn’t be me without you.

January 16 | Nicole & Patrick | The Line Hotel

January 29 | Julie and Matt | Carnegie Institute of Science

January 30 | Lauren & Peter | Private Home

January 31 | Kira and Ben | National Mall

February 20 | Tim & Taylor | Ocean Ridge

March 20 | Anna and Danny | Georgetown

April 7 | Bryant and Jessica | DC War Memorial

April 8 | Keishla & Americo | Stone Tower Winery

April 24 | Caroline & Andrew | 12 Ridges Vineyard

April 28 | Dan and Marianna | DC War Memorial

April 29 | Karen and Cesar | Dumbarton House

May 1 | Armond and Rachel | The Line Hotel

May 10 | Jen and Owen | The Line Hotel

May 15 | Joanna and James | Mount Ida

May 16 | Pheabe and Jonathan | DC War Memorial

May 17 | Gülayşem and Kaan | Inn at Little Washington

May 22 | Lauren and Andrew | Stone Tower Winery

May 23 | Kathleen and David | L’Auberge Chez Francois

May 25 | Amanda and Don | The Clifton Inn

May 29 | Courtney and Vincent | Great Marsh Estate

May 31st | Lori and Charles | Inn at Little Washington

June 5 | Anela and Seamus | District Winery

June 5 | Arlie & Michael | Falls Church

June 6 | Devin and Jeff | Stone Tower Winery

June 11 | Katie and Jake | National Arboretum

June 12 | Laura and Zack | Inn at Perry Cabin

June 12 | Veronica & Eric | Stone Tower Winery

June 18 | Nicole and Vince | Bohemia Overlook

June 20 | Lauren and Gavin | Dumbarton House

June 22 | Lisa and Blake | Stone Tower Winery

July 9 | Erin and Frank | Rock Creek Park

July 17 | Anna and Daniel | Great Marsh Estate

July 29 | Jenna and Peter | Stone Tower Winery

August 5 | Lauren and Justin | Stone Tower Winery

August 7 | Amy and Ravin | Duvall House

August 8 | Carla and Nick | The Hay Adams

August 14 | Hannah & Mark | Stone Tower Winery

August 15 | Aly & Shlomo | Omni Shoreham Hotel

August 29 | Kelsey & Graham | Shadow Creek

September 4 | Emily & Ben | Museum of Women in the Arts

September 10 | Kathryn & Ethan | Stone Tower Winery

September 10 | Kels & Christopher | Eaton DC

September | 11 Lisa & Jason | DAR Constitution Hall

September 12 | Christine & Dan | Raspberry Plain Manor

September 17 | Karly & AJ | Keswick Vineyards

September 18 | Jenny & Alex | River Farm

September 18 | Katherine & Michael | Kindred Pointe Winery

September 24 | Allison & Connor | DC War Memorial

September 25 | Arwa & Greg | Ceresville Mansion

September 30 | Rebekka and Devon | Bluemont Winery

October 1 | Sarah and Pierre | Fairmont Hotel

October 2 | Emily & Andrew | Strathmore Mansion

October 8 | Madi & Walsh | Anderson House

October 9 | Kelley & Nick | Fleetwood Farm

October 15 | Julia & Chris | Strathmore Mansion

October 15 | Shaina and Matt | The Line Hotel

Oct 16 | Krissy & Avinash | Perry Belmont House

Oct 17 | Amanda & Brian | Strong Mansion

October 22 | Irene & Stephen | National Mall

October 29 | Lindsay and Chris | Ritz Carleton Georgetown

October 30 | Sam & Andrew | Airlie

November 6 | Nicole & Chris | Great Oak Manor

November 8 | Zeb & Nick | The Line Hotel

November 13 | Rachel & Juan | Common House

November 21 | Kim and Mike | Woodend Nature Sanctuary

November 25 | Andre and Catherine | Hay Adams